13 thoughts for the day

1.
The most important man-made discovery according to me is: red tapism

2.
Do trees shiver?
When they feel cold?
Do they also complain?

3.
I suspect there is a man
Seated in some office, somewhere
Who invents one rule per minute
Which the rest of us follow

4.
Jayant Mahapatra
Donated 4,000 books and magazines
A German typewriter, a camera, five cupboards
To the University in Balasore
Little did he know
That all of it would be secured under lock and key
Forever

5.
My money plant has a coronary heart disease
When I asked the fern
How did it happen
She replied I dont know
I suffer from Alzheimer

6.
This year, we solemnly swear to invest $1.3 trillion in Project Malthus so that we can officially register all the million instances of starvation in this country

7.
I wonder what is the life expectancy of an idea, these days

8.
How about a permanent RFID tag on the wrist that calculates the lewdness quotient among the male population

9.
Thanks to all the meetings I attend
My bottoms have become tough
Nothing is a pain in the arse
Anymore


10.
The sarpanch was worried
Three rivers attempting suicide
Should I report the matter
To the local tehsildar

11.
We plan to export a billion tear drops
Said the Minister
Of the newly formed
Department of Gloom and Doom

Its time to monetise our pessimism


12.
Instead of an agarbatti
They lit a cigarette in front of the local god
Who inhaled all the smoke
Blessed their injurious healths


13.
A thousand thoughts
Buzzing in my head
All worthless