Three little gems

1.
In this land of ours
The little boy
Asked his maulvi father
Why do trees have Hindu names?

The maulvi whacked him on the head
And said
Don't create a new set of problems


2.
My uncle
Who was a Gaussian inspired economist
Said to me
A nation's prosperity
And true worth
Can be judged by the pedigree of
Her whores


3.
When
I opened the door
Victor Hugo met me
And he was naked

Hugo had surrendered his clothing
To his valet
Who was not to return it
Until the day's writing had been compiled